The Bisexual Flag - Proudly Pulling My Panties up the Flagpole

[darkeyes]

Not that sure its important to have our own flag but sure why not? Title of this thread has always reminded me of time when away for a particularly filthy an yummie weekend we drove through Inverness wiv our recently removed knickers tied 2 the car aerial. Fuzz wer less than happy an we got stopped an told in no uncertain terms that this wos unseemly an 2 take em off. At this statement we broke up in2 hysterical giggles an it musta been 10 minutes before we wer able 2 carry on wiv our journey. Funniest thing wos the humourless sod breathalised me gf cos he thought the gigglin wos a sign we wer pissed as farts!

Always wondered wot the fuss wos bout cos they wer clean on that mornin!

[FerociousFeline]

I am not out to most of my family and seeing anything that indicated that I was bi might start a huge scene. I am really trying to come out to more people but is it wrong to just never tell anyone in my family except my sister? Can't I just go to the Pride Parade and belong to the GLBT group at church? Do I have to wave a flag and bring down scorn from my family?

I'm in pretty much the same situation. My solution? I wear solid purple a lot. Or I wear purple and black.

FF

[mindfinding]

I'm recently coming into the understanding of my bi persons, so Hi. I'm glad the site is here. It is greatly appreciated. Heres my first post.....

On the topic (and a great article btw), I'm not one for flag waving with anything sexual, nor am I prone to happily using the word pride with things concerning orientation. At the same time though, I feel some comfort in knowing that someone took the time to put those colors together. I don't care for the color scheme (needs yellow if you ask me), But I'm touched. I may need to get a key chain.

*Thanks again for having this site put together. It looks great. Many useful pieces here. Thanx.

[DCoke]

Without any foreknowledge, or any indicator I knew what it was the very first time I saw it.

Originally Posted by Iowabiguy
I am not out to most of my family and seeing anything that indicated that I was bi might start a huge scene. I am really trying to come out to more people but is it wrong to just never tell anyone in my family except my sister? Can't I just go to the Pride Parade and belong to the GLBT group at church? Do I have to wave a flag and bring down scorn from my family?

Is it important? Depends on your goals in life.
Should you if you don't want to? Again, depends on your goals in life.
What do you want? Do you want to change the world, or just live your life?
If you don't want your family to know then don't tell them. There are smart reasons to tell people or not tell people, there are activist reasons to tell people. But there's no rule saying everyone has to know.

[DCoke]

I do identify with the flag. And I find purpose in flag waving. And my bisexuality is more than who I have sex with (it's who I love too). It's empowering and makes it a bit harder for antis to ignore us. It's a fuck you to those who would fuck with us.

[bi-robin-calif]

Maybe we need our own secret handshake, like the Mason's. <g>

[teamnoir]

The bi flag is pathetic and it's stupid that we even have one. I wouldn't proudly wave it since it's a futile gesture, and nobody knows what it even means.

I don't wave any flags relating to my orientation, my kinks, or whatever as I see it something that's pointless.

[bim469ky]

I love the look of our flag. I think it proudly states who we are. I have a pic of it plus a bi pride design on my cell phone.

[ohbimale]

I like the Bi Pride Flag and do wear it occassionally. I have also been known to wear the Gay Pride Flag too. I can relate to both and enjoy wearing them.

[DiamondDog]

I'm not that big of a fan of flags for sexual politics.

I prefer just to be myself and not wave a flag or have a symbol at all associated with me or my sexuality.

I see the idea of flags as a silly one and I see it as a pointless gesture that's based on an "Us vs. Them" mentality/tactic of control towards others or a disdain for outsiders from the group.

I mean you don't see heterosexuals going out and making up their own flag and waving it around. There aren't individual flags based on someone's gender like if they are a man or a woman, or a flag for humanity itself.

As much as I associate with the bear/leather/BDSM/GLBT "communities" I don't feel the need to wave their flags.

Let's start a new one like "the annoyed by the flag lovers" or "Not another Flag, Get a Life" or "would you like a ribbon with that flag?" Flag.

OK, I take it back, there’s one flag that I like and that’s PFLAG, which isn’t really a flag/symbol at all.

[Tygress75]

A very interesting article with some well-made points. I personally feel having bisexual symbolism is quite important to further our identity, support, and acceptance as a community. To wit, as a community, bisexuals are largely invisible with little support or knowledge of each other's existance. Often, one's sexuality is associated by outsiders according to the person you are with, not on YOUR feelings. If you happen to be dating a member of the opposite gender, people assume you're straight and vice versa, when one or both persons could be, in fact, bisexual. How can you tell?

Many on this board have already admitted to being unfamiliar with the BiFlag and what it symbolizes. I've read posts for persons looking for bisexual bars to meet people at, with the end result that they are gay/lesbian bars that may be bi-friendly. Many bisexuals feel that the Rainbow Flag and GLBT community is more GL and a lot less BT, and do not identify with those communities and their symbolism. It's no small thing that many in that community feel we're just making a transition to being fully gay or lesbian.

It's difficult enough trying to find commonality in a community that's as varied as it's members... and our numbers are small considering the number of individuals who have had bisexual encounters but do not identify as bisexual, and those who are "fully out" as bisexual, and everything in between. What can we use as some sort of common bond between such a varied group such as ourselves? What can help us to gain visibility & support in a world that considers us invisible? What can help the neophyte bisexual find a place to go when they need help in explaining that their feelings are okay, normal and give them the support they need in their newly-identified orientation? In short, bisexual symbols & pride such as the bi-angles, the biflag and the pink-purple-blue color scheme.

We could argue the aesthetics of the biflag, etc. It's a moot point. We need to embrace its symbolism, make it a recognizable part of our society, in as much as the gay & lesbian community has embraced the rainbow flag and their symbols and have become very visible in the process. Only then will we start to shift from the invisible to the visible, come together as more of a community on our own standing and be more able to help others in their struggle to accept their newly-discovered sexual orientation, and also realize that sexuality, like many other facets of human life, is not strictly "gay/lesbian" or "straight" but everything in between.

You're not the flag-waving type? That's fine! You're only "out" to yourself and/or a select few (this describes me)? That's fine, too! I'm sure you can still find discreet ways to show the bi-pride colors. I make jewlery as a hobby, and have made a few tasteful bracelets and a necklace and wear them when I see fit. You don't need to streak your neighborhood naked wearing pink-purple-blue body paint & a smile (although if you do, please invite me ). You can be as forward or discreet with your bi-pride wear as you like, but still represent so we can build as a community and come out from behind the shadows of others.

[balto38]

Thank you, have a gold star and a big fat kiss.
I recognise some of the symbols used but recently I bumped into the bi flag plastered all over the place, I was going to try to look it up on the internet but how do you look up something like that if you don't know what it's called?

Anyway I've always liked the rainbow flag, it's bright, bold, unmissable and I think it's pretty (I'd love to see the 8 coloured version) but this bi flag, okay fantastic we now have our own flag (yipee I think), but Eik it's ugly. My favorite colour varies between pink and purple but that thing is just horrible.

the flag does look a little dull. maybe if the colors were brighter. or the rainbow colors upsidedown as a suggestion for a bi flag.

[philly1]

the colors are enchanting,love my flag bi,

[Devildog78]

How About This for a Bisexual Flag?


I relate more to this than some Magenta, Purple and Blue stripes.
And to get philosophical about those colors...why choose a color pattern that is at the end of the Rainbow spectrum of the Gay Pride Flag?

I find it defeatist if you ask me.

[MarieDelta]

The colors are representative

Blue - for those that seem straight because of their relationship

Magenta - for the invisibility of Bisexuals everywhere

Pink - for those that appear gay because of their relationship

so its not about "relating to" or "colors at the end of the gay rainbow"

Its about the community, about us.

But, as is normal with communities , if you'd rather use something else, go ahead, you might not be recognized (at least at first.)

This is our movement, and everyone is invited.

[wiz1066]

I bought a rainbow flag off the internet a while ago but my ex boy friend, who himself is gay, went and stole it. I think I'll use that as sign that I should buy a bi pride flag.

Incidentally the site I got the rainbow flag from also sells bi pride flags but they’re more expensive and with no clear indication as to why. Ruddy cheek .

[76135]

Here's how I kind of see things...


http://www.thepassionplace.net/gabilewhwhwh.html

[BiCycler]

Aesthetics is subjective at best. I don't think the flag is any great triumph of beauty. I don't think it's meant to be. It is meant to be symbolic, representative. Any person familiar with flags and flag meanings will tell you that the more powerful flags are those with the simplest, (non-decorated) design.
Someone earlier in this thread talked about pride, saying they, 'are not ashamed, but proud?'. I believe that person was expressing that they did not feel proud about their sexuality. I get that. That's a little like me saying I'm proud I'm white (more like light pink actually). I'm not ashamed , or proud of either. But that is the point, I think. Why do some of us feel afraid to come out? Shame. Not all of us are afraid to come out. I'm partially there and so far have met with more success than disaster. I also feel like a weight is gone from off my shoulders, a freedom that I had not known before. Mostly, I think because I and my declared sexuality have in large part been accepted, often embraced and sometimes even opened the door to others who are doing the same. With most people I encounter, since stepping out of the closet into the light, I feel I can relax and just be me. What a huge difference this has made for me. Especially when new people enter my life and they know me as bisexual: it is no big deal either positively or negatively. It's like a non-issue but not a subject to be avoided either. Once in a while I come across someone who is less than friendly about it and if someone else doesn't make a comment in my defense, I can, with the knowledge that people important to me have absolutely no issue with my sexuality, deal with the situation in such a way that I end up feeling right and certain that my sexuality is not my problem but is that other individual's problem. Let him or her own it, I have life to live and more important things to put my energies to.
So, what is the point? I think the Bisexual Flag is important, at least during transition from fear and shame to freedom and acceptance. I don't mean an individual's progress through self-acceptance to being out, I mean until invisibility, ignorance, intollerance and hatred is all but extinguished, we need a symbol that validates us (to the ignorant, not to ourselves) and helps to build community and identity. There will always be those that feel alone in regards to their sexuality; I was one of those for a long time. While there was something in my upbringing/experience/makeup that allowed me to feel strong enough to accept my sexuality long before I even knew there were other bisexuals (how naive I felt when revelations about people's sexuality became a part of my life experience and finally when I discovered this site). Reflecting on the period I was alone, I did not feel I was missing anything. Now that I'm not alone and have access to the shared experience of others, I understand more about myself and all the conclusions I arrived at about my sexuality and it validates most of that hard work I did to get there. Imagine what that might feel like for someone who today has not found that common ground. One of the revelations I experienced since coming here and only recently is the notion of fluidity. I called notion cycling, hence the nick. I was sure I was the only one who cycled through feelings about women and men. I am ok with not being typical, even though I am discovering more and more that I am typical. My uncertainty with the "normality" of my shifting desires was exacerbated by the comments from gay poeple I call friends. They were telling me there is no such thing as bisexuality. I remained certain there is but had no one else in my world to confirm that. I was not upset to be the only one, I was just very sure I must not be the only one. I began to think there might be something wrong with the fact that I could not (or wasn't) 'settling' on attraction to either men, women or both but had shifting desires instead. I love being bisexual and always have. I hated how that sexuality cycled. After doing much of the hard work by myself to find an understanding of the fluid nature of my sexuality and separating fluidity from bi-gender attraction, I started to seek collective knowledge and wisdom about the topic. It is here that I have come to understand that fluidity is very common. I put a lot of hard work and energies towards that understanding. I feel that if I had encountered others and became more aware earlier, that those resources might have been available for me to work on other mysteries of this thing we call life. (Although the very exercise might in and of itself reap a bigger reward than if I was spoon fed the same). I can not help but to think about those people that are sitting alone at home wondering. Some feeling they are 'bad, wrong, evil, broken etc.'. Some knowing they are not those things, but feeling isolated none-the-less. Providing a symbol helps those people to see the otherwise invisible. It helps to bring people together under a common cause. It helps people to feel a sense of belonging. For that, I display the flag and believe in it's merit.
To the poster that put up the flag of the United States as the symbol for bisexuality, all I can say is ugh. Not as a symbol for a country. For that, I think it's great.